As most of my friends know, I generated a word: Mofessional.
Per popular request, here is the formal definition:

Mofessional (n):

  • 1) A psuedo-professional organization, or person acting as
    an organization. Usually characterized by an uneducated person
    or group trying to pass themselves off as a professional
    organization. e.g. a pimp.
  • 2) A person who is truly competant at his/her job.

The two seemingly disparate meanings depend on the context in which the word is used. For example:

  • This is a mofessional website
  • Your friend does a superb job at something. You explain his great performance by saying, “that’s ’cause you a mofessional!”.
  • Your friend screws something up. You point it out by stating, “Yo, that’s a mofessional job you done did there”.

Origins of the word

I was recording late one night at a studio in Hollywood and our bass player
was trying to sing a high female backup vocal (he was a large guy, not a girl).
As I was so fortunate as to be the producer I came up with the brilliant idea
that “We’re in a recording studio in Hollywood, there has got to be a girl
that can sing here somewhere”. The studio’s door opened into the lobby,
and sure enough, there were four girls sitting there. I asked, “any of you
happen to be singers?”. They responded that they were all singers – a girl
group. I asked if anyone wanted to sing a line of backup on a song for credit
on the album (it did get national distribution and radio airplay, btw).

And then the fun began…

They said that we’d have to talk to their manager, JR, who was in the
studio’s office. So we waited for him to come back. And come back
he did. And we saw him. And the word was born…

Think of your favorite 70’s movie pimp-daddy. That was JR, although
in reality he was toned down a little. Very little. He esplained to
us (not a typo) that “de girls ar recordin’ their album in Studio D”.
(Studio D is the upstairs closet where you do overdubs for $25/hr, not
lead vocals). He further esplained that “we could arrang’ a time at which
they could come and record wit us. And I’m certain that you’ll be
compensatin’ the girls for their time…”.

For some reason I called JR “FQ de Mofessional”. He was trying to
act professional, but clearly wasn’t. And, “mofessional” just seemed to
go with his psuedo-ebonics accent.

We spent the rest of the night suggesting ways we might compensate
the girls for their time.

As a note, we never got them to record with us, and I think we ended
up slowing down the tape to record the high vocal line…

If you’re a manager of a girl group, might I suggest that if someone
wants a girl to record a single line on a song, you might at least
just ask for $20-$50 bucks to do it now? That would be the truly mofessional
thing to do.